Misinformation, Disinformation, Facts and Feelings in a time of chaos and polarization

I have long taught people that in a world where we can focus on facts or feelings in our conversations with others, we should address and de-escalate feelings FIRST, before we talk about facts. This has been based on the premise that people will not remember what you said or did, but they will remember how you made them feel, and when we build relationship and connection and lay the seeds of trust to grow we can then turn our attention to a conversation about the facts in constructive, deliberate ways. 

I've consistently suggested strategies to deal with misinformation and disinformation like:

• Working through trusted partners, community members, ambassadors to share information so it comes from trusted sources
• Use methods that allow people to experience something different such as field trips, human library, photo voice and tours
• Use methods that focus on sharing and exploration where people can tell about their experiences and values like socratic circle, open space, world cafe etc
• Center emotions and get them on the table so you can get to the root of the challenge
• Increase humanity and authenticity in the sharing of information with story telling and a human face

I still believe these things work. But they work better in times of conflict and outrage. I think the times we are in now go far beyond these strategies and approaches.

I believe we need something more than this in a world of chaos, disruption, polarization and misinformation.

First, let's agree on some terminology so when I use certain words, they mean the same thing to you too.

Misinformation is usually a mistake. For example, my neighbour tells me the City approved a 40-story tower to be built at the end of our street, and she is angry and frustrated and spreading the word too other neighbours so we can oppose this decision. In reality, the City received an application from a developer for a 20-story tower for the end of our street. She is angry and frustrated and doesn't trust the City, and she is mobilizing resources to resist - and her facts aren't quite right but they are in right direction, and they validate her feelings and the story she is telling.

Disinformation is grounded in dishonesty. Elon Musk recently tweeted that the US federal agency U.S.A.I.D. is “a criminal organization,” comparing foreign aid to “money laundering,” and calling USAID employees an “arm of the radical-left globalists.” This is simply false. It is a federal agency that spends $68 billion dollars approved by Congress on humanitarian aid globally, improving health, advocating for democracy and saving lives each year. That doesn't mean the organization couldn't be more efficient, effective or improved. But the information being promoted is dishonest, designed to serve another agenda or purpose.

That is where disinformation and malinformation merge. Think about malformation as information with malicious intent, designed to cause harm. In this case, the information that was tweeted was part of a plan to break laws, disregard the legal responsibility of Congress and shut down the department.

Now that we have a clear idea about the terminology and what we are talking about what do we do?

Arguing facts doesn't change minds - it makes things more polarized

When we fight facts with facts, we are often faced with situations where people hold strong beliefs based on personal experiences and values, and they don't just reject your facts, they double down and dig in with a righteous certainty that their facts are right and your facts are wrong. This is called the backfire effect and Graeme Newell is a great source about brain science and decision making. 

If the facts we believe are connected to our values, belief systems and identity, any threats to these facts feel like a personal attack on who we are. That triggers a protection response in the brain, and we defend the sense of self that is being threatened. If people dig in and become more attached to their position when presented with a different set of facts, then we can actually do harm, escalate the conflict and increase polarization by fighting facts with facts.

So what do you do?

1. Decide if you will engage

In a time of polarization, chaos and disruption you need to decide what situations you are going to engage in, and in what way you are going to intervene, interact or let go. It comes down to how important this situation, people and issue are.

Ask yourself, What is this moment calling for from you? How strongly and passionately do you feel about this issue? How tied to your own identity, values and beliefs is it? What are the potential consequences if you let this one go by, and someone else steps in?

I would encourage you to be thoughtful and deliberate about what you choose to step into. At the moment, I feel overwhelmed by the sheer volume of misinformation and disinformation out there right now, and it could be a full time job to step in on everything, so choose wisely and carefully the skirmishes in this war where you will strategically engage.

2. Gather your courage

Deciding to engage with the mis or dis information requires courage. You will be putting yourself out there, engaging with others who feel or think differently, and you may find yourself exposed or vulnerable. Those things aren't necessarily bad, just something you need to be aware of. If you are a member of a group or community being targeted by this mis and dis information, tread carefully and weigh the risks to your mental and physical safety. Get support, seek allies, consider how others have been responded to.

All that said, Desmond Tutu once said that "We can't be silent. If you are neutral in situations of injustice you have chosen the side of the oppressor." It takes enormous courage to stand up in the face of opposition and resistance. It is also so important to know that those who are fueling the fire of mis and dis information are counting on fear to reduce push back, and they are creating a false impression that "everyone" thinks like they do to counter that opposition.

3. Invite a conversation grounded in curiosity and complexity

In order to address mis and dis information, we need to build relationship, connection and plant the seeds of trust. This means, we need to slow things down to reduce reactivity, and establish humanity so we see each as more than positions, issues or sides.

This is based on the research that answers the question how do people change their minds?

The research shows very limited effectiveness with solely fact-based approaches or education campaigns in changing public views. In the same way calls to action or protest call out those who already have taken the same position, but tend to solidify resistance.

What does work is:

• Contact and connection in combination with education and personal resonance. That means the humanity and stories of experiences we can relate to our own lives so we can see, feel and understand the other side better even if we don't agree with it.
• Contact with peers, networks and connections - building new connections, relationships and interactions to explore different ideas, and doing so through relationship.
• Dialogue, conversation, learning and connection all make an impact. When we talk together in thoughtful, constructive ways we become open to seeing new ideas, humbled and aware of experiences different than our own, and we increase our social complexity and as a result our cognitive complexity, which allows us to see issues in new ways.

To put it plainly, people change their minds through a combination of conversation and experience.

Human rights activist and wise woman Loretta Ross has said, "You don't have the magic power to make other people change, but you have the power to offer the love and support to give 'em the space to grow. Whether they avail themselves of that space is beyond your control. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make 'em think. I haven't found humans are that amenable to being bossed around unless they're in a cult, and we're not building a human rights cult. We're building a human rights movement." 

We need to invite a real conversation, grounded in curiosity and complexity. That takes time, energy, effort and a willingness to get in the conversation, on all sides. It also means we each need to let go of our own certainty, righteous indignation and the desire to the prove the other side wrong. Way easier to say than it is to do.

4. Build capacity to question, re-think and let go of assumptions

In order to change someone else's mind we have to be someone who is willing to have our own mind changed. That means we need to ask ourselves, and also be willing to ask friends, colleagues, community and family members some big questions when we digest information. Questions like:

• Is this opinion or fact?
• Is there evidence for this fact from multiple reputable sources?
• Do I trust the source of the information? What do I know about the source of the information?
• Is there more to this story than what I am hearing? Is there more context, complexity or history that would help me see the big picture?
• What biases or assumption might be at play for me or others as we digest this information? What emotions or experiences might this information be trying to play on or intentionally manipulate?

 We all have a responsibility to slow down the churn of reactivity and momentum that creates the tsunami of emotion that happens with mis and dis information. So do your part, and encourage others to do theirs too.

5. Take a stand

The foundation of leadership is knowing what you stand for, so you can stand up for it.  When disinformation is causing harm to you, your organization, employees or community it is important to stand up and call it out.

That will require you to:

Prepare yourself: why are you taking action on this issue at this time? Be clear about your purpose and intentions so you can cleanly and clearly lead. For example, if you are angry about something that has been said and want to explain how another person is wrong, your motivations can get messy, and your delivery and comments can be dismissed as retribution or revenge, and you can seem less credible. However, if you are committed to transparency and openness, and speak truth from a place of courage and generosity, you will be seen as more credible, and your "why" for raising and correcting the issue will be more credible.

Be willing to say what you know, don't know and want to know. You may be certain some of the facts are wrong and misleading, however it is unlikely you know all the details about everything related to an issue. Be clear about that. For example, "Here is what I know for sure. This issue is complex and there are a lot of important facts that are relevant to understanding it fully. One of those facts is that.........(give your correction). I'm certain about that fact and can share evidence that backs it up. What I'm curious about or need to understand more fully is how others have experienced this situation and how this issue has affected people. I'm asking that if you have a story, you reach out to me to share it. I'm listening and want to make the best decision based on ALL the facts."

Keep it up. Keep correcting, being clear and honest, showing up with courage and openness.

6. If the times are disruptive, then we need to disrupt

The old rules and the status quo are broken, and new ways of doing things are everywhere - many of them contributing to increased polarization and escalated conflict. The World Economic Forum 2025 Global Risks report identified Misinformation and Disinformation as the #1 risk facing humanity over the next 2 years. The number 1 risk. It identifies societal polarization as the #4 risk. These things go directly together. These are the greatest risks facing humanity. Saying it again in case you didn't get it :)

Clearly we need to do things differently if we are going to address those risks.

For me that means we need to turn things on their heads. Because those who are spreading misinformation and disinformation have already done that.

Could we:

• Sponsor a hackathon to get the facts out there on key issues and seed social media with stories and memes that are true?
• Play 2 truths and 1 lie or spot the facts bingo?
• Create online and in person games that build capacity and fun in exploring the facts and disinformation on key issues?
• Use humour to call out lies?
• Invite those on the other side to sit down and help us solve the problems together?
• Write a theme song for misinformation and disinformation that we encourage people to play with a catchy tune and lyrics to use when we spot those lies?
• Take advantage of the love of celebrity culture and get all those celebrities people love to talk about facts, misinformation and disinformation
• Place Super Bowl ads (and other big sporting events) about how to spot a lie and what to do when we see one?
• Run drills in schools and work places with air raid sirens when disinformation affects our lives and work, poor of like "stop, drop and roll" but instead "spot, speak and tell the truth"?

These aren't all great ideas but you get where I am going.

Let's get together and hold a bad ideas brainstorm and come up with disruptive, creative ideas to challenge this trend. I'd be happy to host the brainstorm - want to join me? Send me a note!

How we show up in these challenging times will determine where the winds of change take us. If we don't show up, we have no impact on how the wind blows.

This isn't easy or simple but it is possible. There is no playbook for this moment in time we find ourselves in. There is only choosing how to show up, how and when to engage, and standing for something better, for all of us. Together.